Cat Trouble

by carolynholm

awkward-avail

Dear Mommy,

I don’t understand cats at all.

XOXOXO

Poppy

 

Dear Poppy,

Don’t worry, you’re not alone in that.

Love, Carolyn

 

Dear Mommy,

Right? Cats are confusing! Especially Puffin. I can’t understand half of what he says! It’s all garbled! He makes no sense at all.

XOXOXO

Poppy

 

Dear Poppy,

That’s because he’s garbling French and English.

Love, Carolyn

 

Dear Mommy,

Why does he do that?????!

XOXOXO

Poppy

 

Dear Poppy,

He’s delusional. He thinks he’s French.

Love, Carolyn

 

Dear Mommy,

He’s French????

XOXOXO

Poppy

 

Dear Poppy,

No, he thinks he’s French. He’s actually from Los Angeles. He was found wandering around in a South Central gutter when he was a tiny kitten. Poor baby, he was sick and covered with fleas.

Love, Carolyn

 

Dear Mommy,

That makes him French?

XOXOXO

Poppy

 

Dear Poppy,

Of course not. That makes him lucky to have a good home. But for some reason he thinks he’s French. We love him so we let him have this delusion. Just ignore him.

Love, Carolyn

 

Dear Mommy,

Ignore him? He’s scary!!!!! He hides and waits for me to walk down the hall, then he ambushes me! And then he says rude things to me in French.

XOXOXO

Poppy

 

Dear Poppy,

Seriously? That’s it? He says rude things to you in French? This is way too much drama. Do other households have to put up with stuff like this?

Love, Carolyn

 

 

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