The Sneeze

by carolynholm

Dear Puffin,

Why are you looking so worried?

Love, Carolyn

 

Cher Madame,

C’est vrai, is it true, Madame and Monsieur are going to divorce?

Regards,

M. Le Poufin

 

Dear Puffin,

Of course not! Where on earth did you get this idea?

Love, Carolyn

 

Cher Madame,

Monsieur said this.

Regards,

M. Le Poufin

 

Dear Puffin,

Okay, tell me exactly what Monsieur said.

Love, Carolyn

 

Cher Madame,

He said “When we split up, I’ll get Puffin and you’ll get Poppy, but who gets custody of Mia?”

Regards,

M. Le Poufin

 

Dear Puffin,

He was KIDDING. We were both kidding. We are not splitting up, honey.

Love, Carolyn

 

Cher Madame,

But who gets custody of Mia?

Regards,

M. Le Poufin

 

Dear Puffin,

It was a joke! No one is getting custody of anybody!

Love, Carolyn

 

Cher Madame,

Then why did he talk about splitting up?

Regards,

M. Le Poufin

 

Dear Puffin,

I can’t remember, sweetie. It started with a remark about the cooking, or the cleaning up, or who knows what. Seriously, you have absolutely no sense of humor.

Love, Carolyn

 

Cher Madame,

It was because he said you made him sneeze.

Regards,

M. Le Poufin

 

Dear Puffin,

Oh that. I didn’t “make” him sneeze. I was sweeping the porch and the dust made him sneeze. And besides, no one splits up over a sneeze. A sneeze just is not that kind of threat level.

Love, Carolyn

 

Cher Madame,

A little cat never knows. Like the other night.

Regards,

M. Le Poufin

 

Dear Puffin,

What about the other night?

Love, Carolyn

 

Cher Madame,

Mia et moi, we were terrified and we jumped off the bed and ran down the hall. Because Madame she startled us with a loud rude noise. Un sneeze.

Regards,

M. Le Poufin

 

Dear Puffin,

So what was all that drama about? It was just a sneeze. And a sneeze is not something to make such a big deal about. It’s definitely not enough for divorce. It would take a lot more than that to split us up. Like, maybe coughing.

Love, Carolyn

 

Cher Madame,

Aha! So Madame would consider divorce!!!!!!!

Regards,

M. Le Poufin

 

Dear Puffin,

I’m kidding, you lunkhead.

Love, Carolyn

 

 

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