Carolyn Holm

Dear Puffin,
What are we going to DO with you? 
Carolyn

Cher Madame,
C’est regarding…?
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
You know what this is regarding, Puffin. Last night we woke up to a terrible crash, because you had wrestled Winston’s feeder right off the cabinet.
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
The feeder she jumped. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
It hit the floor with such a resounding crash that something broke inside. Now it is dead as a doornail. 
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
The doornail she is perhaps still alive. Has Madame turned the feeder off and then on again? 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
Oh please. It is permanently off now. 
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
It is likely the feeder just needs the new little batteries. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
No, batteries are pointless now. It refuses to come back to life. 
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
Well then, perhaps Madame can get a new feeder for the Winston. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
We have ordered one. But I have to point out to you, these feeders are very expensive. They are specially made to open only for the programmed micro chip. Do you realize how annoyed I am with you? 
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
This petit cat was annoyed as well. By the annoying feeder. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
YOU were annoyed with it? You kept cramming your head into it while Winston was eating, so that you could jam it open. 
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
The feeder lid, she would not stay open. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
Of course it wouldn’t stay open! Because it was programmed for Winston’s micro chip, not yours. But hey, not for lack of trying on your part. Poor Winston. You just won’t let him eat without coercion. 
Love, Carolyn  

Cher Madame,
He eats with tranquility today. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
Not really. He is eating in the bedroom, with the door shut to keep you out, so that you can’t bully his food away from him. Poor guy. He can’t just relax and peacefully eat. He’s as jumpy as an antelope at a Serengeti waterhole. 
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
Madame is being wildly dramatic as usual. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
When we get the new feeder, we will need to figure out where to set it up. 
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
On the cabinet, Madame, where cats enjoy the food every day. I am surprised that this must be explained to Madame. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
If it is on the cabinet, you will surely wrestle it down to the floor. Destroying another feeder. So I need to set it up on the floor. I might keep it in the bedroom, and let him dine in there with the door closed so he can eat in peace. Poor Winston, his habit has always been to be a grazer, but this is forcing him to eat his meal all at one sitting. 
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
The Winston only eats little bits at a time. It takes him all day to eat breakfast. This petit cat is much more sensible. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
You are a glutton, Puffin. You pack it in. You inhale your food, sneak the dog’s food, steal Winston’s food. You live for the morning automatic feeder event, hanging around just before it releases your breakfast – “wait for it…wait for it…wait for it…BINGO!!!!”  You are crazy when it comes to food. 
Love, Carolyn 

Cher Madame,
Madame is extremely harsh today. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin 

Dear Puffin,
Like I said, sweetie, we are extremely annoyed with you. 
Carolyn 

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A note to our readers…

Feeder Update: Winston’s new feeder is back on the cabinet, duct-taped to a heavy 12” marble tile so it is too heavy for Puffin to move. Time will tell if that works.

Poppy, Winston, and Puffin are looking forward to sharing their weekly correspondence with you! Each week one of them is featured here, all based upon actual conversations. And yes, you can get the week’s post conveniently in your email every Friday by subscribing in the subscriber box at the top of this page. (If you are reading this in an email, go to blog.carolynholm.com to subscribe.) If you have already subscribed, multiple paws are raised to salute you!