The Oven Mitt

by carolynholm

Dear Winston,
What a bunch of yahoos you all are.
Carolyn

Hey Mom,
Cool!!!!!! We are?
Winston

Dear Winston,
Yes! This morning you all exploded and went berserk when the UPS man dropped a box on the porch and waved through the window. You three went into to full “WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE” mode.
Carolyn

Mom,
It was startling!!!!!! So exciting!!!!! And then I ran up and down the hall!
Winston

Dear Winston,
You were the worst. You set the other two off.
Carolyn

Hey Mom,
Poppy was going to bark at him anyway. I just heard him before she did. And when he waved, Puffin freaked out.
Winston

Dear Winston,
I was trying to take a class on Zoom. Thank heavens I was muted.
Love, Carolyn

Hey Mom,
Why don’t you just hang out with us? You don’t need a class!
Winston

Dear Winston,
I love my class! I’m so glad that San Francisco Ballet offers adult classes on Zoom! But sometimes you three make it awkward.
Love, Carolyn

Hey Mom,
You bring the dining chairs into the living room, so clearly you want us to sit there with you.
Winston

Dear Winston, 
It’s a barre class. The two chairs are there to be my barre. Not a perch for trouble-makers.
Love, Carolyn

Hey Mom,
Is that why you wear an oven mitt on your hand?
Winston

Dear Winston,
Of course that’s why. Because you can’t seem to leave my hand alone. 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
I love to play with your hand!
Winston

Dear Winston,
My hand isn’t a kitten! Your claws and teeth hurt! There I am, in the middle of jetés, and I’ve got an insane cat attacking my hand. Of course I need to wear a mitt.
Love, Carolyn

Hey Mom,
Sometimes I ask to be picked up and you refuse.
Winston

Dear Winston,
You expect me to do the tendu combination holding a huge cat. Not going to happen. 
Love, Carolyn

Hey Mom,
You constantly kick Poppy.
Winston

Dear Winston,
I do NOT kick Poppy! Sometimes she is stretched out on the floor right behind me, and if I don’t notice her, she gets bumped during grandes battements. Bumped. Not kicked.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
So, are you a ballet dancer?
Winston

Dear Winston,
Of course not. I’m just trying to stay fit. Ballet is my favorite way to do that.
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
But sometimes you say “She’s trying to kill us!” 
Winston

Dear Winston,
Oh dear, I don’t mean that literally, sweetie – I just say that when we are doing something particularly difficult!
Love, Carolyn

Hey Mom,
We like to take your class with you!
Winston

Dear Winston,
I know. But I just wish the three of you were a bit more in the background. The teacher has a dog, and in three years of classes that well-behaved dog has probably only barked three times. But you crazy maniacs disrupt my workout nearly every time! Fortunately, I’m muted, and you’re usually out of camera range, so I don’t have to apologize to the teacher. 
Love, Carolyn

Mom,
She asked about the oven mitt.
Winston

Dear Winston,
She did. I can’t believe I had to explain that there was a good reason for me to be wearing an oven mitt during a ballet class.
Love, Carolyn

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