Nitzels

by carolynholm

Hey Lady Mom,
Where are my nitzels?
Winston

Dear Winston,
Your nitzels? 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Lady Mom,
Puffin says my nitzels were nipped. He says I was noodled.
Winston

Dear Winston,
Now I understand. Not noodled, by the way. You were neutered. But I like the word noodled. I know where Puffin got that. It came from a Brazilian friend of ours who was offended that we “noodled the dog”. 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Lady Mom,
Poppy was noodled too?!!!!
Winston

Dear Winston,
No, it was a previous dog. But Poppy was spayed. That’s what is done for lady dogs.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Lady Mom,
So, what happens to nitzels?
Winston

Dear Winston,
They are something you don’t need any more. They go to the same place as baby teeth. 
Love, Carolyn

Dear Lady Mom,
Are you making that up?
Winston

Dear Winston,
Possibly.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Lady Mom,
Puffin also says I’m not very manly. 
Winston

Dear Winston,
Of course you’re not. You are a kitten. You should stop listening to Puffin.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Lady Mom,
He can be a grumpy guy. 
Winston

Dear Winston,
He can be, but I notice that you completely disarm him by running right up and nuzzling him.
Love, Carolyn

Dear Lady Mom,
Yes! And now he plays with me!
Winston

Dear Winston,
He does. A bit rough at times, but he is indeed playing. You are making progress!
Love, Carolyn

Dear Lady Mom,
He is probably just jealous because my nitzels got noodled.
Winston

Credit where credit is due: “Noodling” came from a Brazilian friend’s “English as a second language” version of “neutering”, but “nitzels” is from the very funny Ze Frank of True Facts.

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