Carolyn Holm

Cher Madame,
The kitchen she is in disorder. Complete disorder. The feeder doesn’t march. And this pauvre petit cat is starving.
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
I know you are upset, Puff honey, but we had to make some changes.
Love, Carolyn

Cher Madame,
One does not care for changes, Madame.
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
All this time we couldn’t figure out how you were gaining so much weight. I described to the vet how we measure your portion at each mealtime, and she was as puzzled as we were. And then two days ago I found you cleaning up Poppy’s food bowl. You have been eating her food!
Love, Carolyn

Cher Madame,
C’était there for the taking. How was this petit cat to know it was only for the dog?
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
You knew, Buddy.  Oh yes, you knew perfectly well. That’s why you NEVER let me catch you in the act. Until two days ago.
Love, Carolyn

Cher Madame,
No one explained to this petit cat that the dog food was the forbidden meal.
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
I didn’t think we needed to! It’s a special food to keep her teeth clean – the nuggets are large and hard, so her teeth get cleaned just breaking them down. Who knew a cat could even get his mouth around them? You did the impossible, you rascal.
Love, Carolyn

Cher Madame,
There are other irregularities in the kitchen as well. The feeder does not march.
Regards, M. Le Poufin 

Dear Puffin,
Your feeder has been reprogrammed for Poppy’s microchip. It’s her feeder now. That’s why it no longer works for you.
Love, Carolyn

Cher Madame,
What is this pauvre petit cat to do without a feeder? Madame is planning a starvation.
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
You don’t need a chip-operated feeder. No one can steal your food, because you inhale it so fast. It is all gone in less than a minute. So, we will now feed you in a regular dish. And honey, no one will let you starve.
Love, Carolyn

Cher Madame,
This petit cat does not do the inhaling.
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
You don’t even chew, sweetie. I’ve never seen anything like it. 
Love, Carolyn

Cher Madame,
This petit cat does not do the annoying slurpy crunchy chewing like the Winston does.
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
Winston does it right, sweetie. He thoughtfully chews every bite. He takes the time to enjoy it. Actually, in this he is more French than you are! He doesn’t cram it all down his gullet, the moment he is fed.
Love, Carolyn

Cher Madame,
Gullet? Madame makes this all sound sordid. Alors, Madame is saying the feeder will no longer open when this petit cat stands politely before it?
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
That is correct. It is no longer your feeder. That’s why it is in Poppy’s corner now. And you have a new ceramic bowl in the cat corner.
Love, Carolyn

Cher Madame,
Bien sûr, Poppy will never figure out the feeder. 
Regards, M. Le Poufin

Dear Puffin,
She already has, Puff honey. Already has.
Love, Carolyn

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A note to our readers…

Puffin, Poppy, and Winston are looking forward to sharing their weekly correspondence with you! Each week one of them is featured here, and yes, you can get the week’s post conveniently in your email every Friday by subscribing in the subscriber box at the top of this page. (If you are reading this in an email, go to blog.carolynholm.com to subscribe.) If you have already subscribed, multiple paws are raised to salute you!